I write this post in response to a couple of stories from a work colleague. She is 32, and has 2 friends who are, quite literally, dying. One is male, and has been in the news as the drug he needs has been approved to go on the PBS, but the price hasn't been negotiated. His name is Scott DeYoung and you may have seen in him the news recently. His drug costs $120,000 for one round (just 4 injections of the stuff). Luckily, Scott has had the money donated, including $30,000 from an anonymous doner (isn't it great to know there are still such giving people out there!).
Scott will now have a few more months (ie. more than 4) with his kids, one of which is only about 10 months old. This, hopefully, will buy him more time, at which point there is hopefully another advancement in medicine and perhaps another drug available to him.
The other person I mentioned is a woman, also 32, with 2 young kids. She also has terminal cancer that is in her bloodstream, and has been given a time frame of 12-18 months.
Take a second to consider - how would you feel, being told that your life span is about to be cut cruelly short, and very suddenly. Would you fear for your children? Would you fear that they might forget you? Would you fear that your partner might never be able to provide for them on their own? Would you fear that your kids would be so emotionally destroyed that they go down a different path in life than the one you had planned for them?
All of this, and I haven't even mentioned yet how scared you would be for yourself.
This woman had a mole. She left it, for quite some time. By the time she had it checked and cut out, it was too late - the cancer had spread. How do you spend your last days on earth trying to enjoy your life, without holding onto the biggest regret of your life in not going to the doctor sooner than you did? I don't have the answer. And I hope I never have to find out.
Watching my work colleague try and deal with this has also been tough. These are her friends. Friends whom she has known a long time, shared birthdays, weddings and newborn children with. And not just one friend, but two.
I personally know a woman who has her own battle going on, and who is fortunate enough to have an entire community that loves and cares for her. Nadine was diagnosed in 2011 with breast, lymphatic and liver cancer, shortly after the birth of her 3rd little girl. In the time since she was diagnosed, her friends have organised a massive fundraiser (during which I have NEVER seen so many people at the local clubrooms! So many people) and she has been a recipient of the Orange Pigeon's wish-granting services (she got to attend the 2011 AFL Grand Final). On the 12th April 2013 she was on The Project in a feature about Orange Pigeon.
In the last 3 years my eyes have been opened to cancer. I have learnt that there are foundations such as Orange Pigeon that help adults living with cancer, and I have learnt that entire communities will rally when called upon. I have learnt that it is not an easy thing to talk about, with others and with sufferers, and I've learnt that if I'm worried about my health under no circumstances should I wait to check it out.
Late last year I had my skin checked at Australian Skin Cancer Clinics in Blackburn, and I found that despite the 3-month waiting list and the $75 fee (which is medicare-subsidised just like a normal doctor), I would have paid that and more for the peace of mind it has given me. The doc advised my skin has 'no more damage than anyone else my age', which is shocking to me as I am as white as casper. I must have done a pretty awesome job of my sun protection, and a shout out to mum and dad for being paranoid as hell when I was a kid!
Even though I'm rather young (30), I'm considering getting a Mammogram sometime in the next few years, as the incidences of breast cancer in 30-40 year olds is rising, and as I mentioned, I'm happy to pay for that peace of mind, knowing that my time on this earth isn't going to be cut short by illness. It's scary, learning of so many people getting cancer and wondering 'could I be next?'. It's not a great way to live your life, but it does pop up every now and again.
There's also some great tools out there to help you help someone you know that has cancer, and how you can learn to deal with it. Given that 1 in 9 women are going to get breast cancer in their lives, you are more than likely going to know someone at some point that you will have to help, perhaps even care for.
To all those suffering through it, and all of those helping them to deal with it, you are loved, more than you know. You are the very definition of a fighting spirit, which most of us sit back and watch in awe.
